Speed dating

How to succeed at speed dating

Speed dating is one of the easiest, fastest and most fun ways to meet a lot of women in a single evening.

If you’ve never tried speed dating before, it’s a little bit similar to the game called ‘musical chairs’. Basically, the women are seated at tables and the men rotate around the room until each man and woman has had a chance to meet each other. You will sit and talk to a woman for about 5 to 10 minutes and then you’ll hear a signal that tells you it’s time to switch and you’ll move to the next woman.

Each person is given a ‘score card’ and if you like a woman (or several women) and would like to get their contact information, you will mark their name(s) on the card. And if those same women also have an interest in seeing you again, they will mark your name down.

At the end of the speed dating event or soon after, the event’s organizers will compare the cards. If the women you meet are also interested in you, you will each get the other’s contact information (e-mail or phone number). And then you contact the woman to talk further or to arrange a date.

However, if she likes you but you weren’t attracted to her or vice-versa, then neither of you will receive the other’s contact information. No rejection worries there. These events are often held at bars or clubs and there’s usually a nominal fee to participate. You can find speed dating events in your area advertised in your local newspaper or the Internet.

The best part is that if you’re not feeling it with a particular woman, your ‘date’ will only last a few minutes. Plus, even if you have to talk to a woman you’re not interested in, it’s a great way to get you relaxed and ready to talk to a woman you do you like. Okay, now that you know the basics, let’s get down to how to succeed at speed dating.

Of course you’ll want to look your best. That doesn’t mean you have to wear a suit (unless it’s appropriate to the event), but you do want to wear something nice and be properly groomed.

Since the women will be meeting many men, you’ll want to make a memorable first impression. This is the perfect time to stand out from the crowd by using your sense of humor and teasing her a bit. Just be sure not to use the same jokes and teases with each girl since you often will be sitting close to the last woman you spoke with and if she overhears you, you don’t want her to think that you were giving her a line. Lines are lame.

To come up with some funny to say, you might notice what a girl is wearing and say (with a smile), “That’s looks like an expensive outfit. I don’t know – you look kind of high maintenance to me…” Or you might take a similar tact and say something like, “My wife forced me to do this…she’s at home waiting to see how man yes’s I get…”

The point is to tease her, shock her, say something funny and throw her off her game a bit so she laughs and remembers you.

The subject of what you do for a living will invariably come up. This is another chance to stand out and not give a boring recitation of what you do for a living. For instance, if you are a construction worker, you might say something like, “I play in the dirt all day and build things…” Or if you’re an accountant, you might answer, “I make sure that the numbers add up and I help people to get rich.” If you’re a student, you might comment, “I spend my day working on my future…”

No matter what you do, just figure out a way to discuss your occupation in an interesting and unusual manner. Remember, you’re not at a job interview, so don’t hog the conversation and don’t be formal – it’s supposed to be fun and interesting. Get her to talk about herself and listen to what she’s saying.

Even if you’re not attracted to the woman you’re talking with and spot someone more striking a few tables over, don’t keep glancing over at the other woman. You’ll get to her soon enough. Women rarely attend these events by themselves and that gorgeous gal you’ve been eyeing, might turn out to be the friend of the girl you’re ignoring. When they compare notes later, if the beautiful woman thinks you were rude to her friend, even if it was because she was the object of your attention, you’re probably going to be a goner. So focus on the woman you’re with. It’s good practice and good manners.

When you’ve been talking to a woman you do like and you realize that your time is going to be up, smile and say, “Finally – I get to talk to someone else! That was the worst 10 minutes of my life!” Then tell you’re kidding and say, “No, I’ve enjoyed talking to you…you seem pretty cool. We should chat again sometime” and get up and leave.

It’s just that easy. Why not give speed dating a chance and practice your skills with women?

Self-Amusement And Making Girls And Dating FUN Again

Self-Amusement is a particularly important concept for nighttime game, like at bars and clubs. Less so if you’re doing day game, but the principles are still important.

The idea of self-amusement is that you want to have FUN meeting girls. That going out is not supposed to be so serious, and the state you want really is to be totally relaxed and giving out positive energy.

So self-amusement can be yelling, singing, busting jokes, chatting up the people around you, talking to your friends from across the room. Making silly faces at girls, poking girls, playing games with the girls like thumb wrestling. Saying things that are absurd, hilarious, offensive, non-sensical.

Basically have your own fun.

Be positive, radiate it!

So the key here is that you want to practice making yourself laugh. So that you can just walk up to the girls and just make yourself laugh, and the girls will instantly be into it.

Because if you’re going to go out, you might as well make it fun. Because if you’re not having fun, let’s face it, the club and bar are pretty miserable. So you’re number one question you should be asking yourself is, “How can I make this FUN for myself?”

Why Self-Amuse? It Draws Women In
Self-amusement draws the women in like crazy… because when everything is FUN for you and no big deal, everything because FUN and no big deal to the girls either, because of state transference.

So you can say shocking and wild things that might otherwise make a girl pissed off, but she’ll feel good about it, because YOU feel so good. Meaning she’s going to pick up on your good state, not the content of your words.

And that’s part of the self-amusement, is positive leading. Plow over any bullshit or negativity a girl has. Just ignore it. Ignore any bullshit or negative nonsense and plow the girl over with your positivity and what will happen is, the girl will be attracted to your better state and you’ll pull her in, she’ll want to enter your reality of fun and positivity if you just persist a little.

And then you never look like you’re getting rejected either. It’s more like the girls are simply leaving your party which is more fun than theirs.







Don’t Be So Logical And Serious

Because here’s the thing. Most guys in bars and clubs are being too logical. They’re too logical and they’re too safe. It’s like they’re giving the girl their resume. “Hi, my name is Joe, I’m a cool guy you should get to know and I have X, Y, Z going for me, and listen to this funny routine I memorized.”

Screw logical approaches, screw rational thinking. You want to become the party, even if it feels retarded. You want to approach, be positive, fun, and dominant.



Self-Amusement Versus Reacting


So let me breakdown a comparison of self-amusement to reacting to the environment.

Self-amusement: you control how you feel from inside, instead of letting the outside environment and outside stimulus determine how you feel. So whether you’re getting good reaction or bad reactions, it doesn’t matter, your state is internally generated.

Self-amusement: stronger emotions, you are where the party is at.

Self-amusement: you persist, you stay in set, because how you act and respond doesn’t depend on how the girl is reacting to you. You bring the fun, and you allow the girl to react to you.

Self-amusement: total fun and nonsense instead of being logical and calculating.

Self-amusement: you’re generating the fun instead of looking for other people to make you happy and bring the fun.

Self-amusement: you’re making fun to amuse yourself. It is NOT meant to impress the girl or convey value.

Self-amusement: you don’t care about the girl’s reactions, you have self-trust that all people on Earth respond well to fun and positivity through the law of state transference.

Self-amusement: You’re pumping your own state instead of looking to the girls to pump your state.

Self-amusement: You’re in your own personal universe, in your own reality of fun and positivity, sucking girls into your vortex, instead of looking to the girls to make you happy with validation.

Self-amusement: You generate your own positive energy internally, you’re not pinging off the environment or girls to determine how you should feel.

So that’s a basic breakdown of how a guy who is self-amusing himself sees the world, versus a guy who is reacting to everything in his environment and looking for positive validation from girls to make him feel happy.

Make Everything Self-Amusing
So the best way to self-amuse yourself and be a cool, charismatic guy is to find everything in the world as funny and entertaining to you.

Instead of being pissed off or down, or walking around depressed, instead by the fun, positive guy who finds everything self-amusing and funny. And the girl will feel lit up just by being in your presence.

If the girl is having fun then she’ll keep coming back to you for more of it. Look at it as like you’re offering her a gift of good feelings. Not that you’re trying to pump up her feelings, but by making yourself amused and happy and feeling good, you’re giving her a part of yourself.



Lower Your Standards

The key to becoming self-amused then is you’ve got to lower your standards for having fun. You’ve got to be able to make everything fun and be able to have your own fun, even if you’re by yourself. You can clap your hands to the music, smile, say hello to girls in funny and strange ways to see what kind of funny and strange reactions you’ll get.

It’s like if your household chore is that it’s your job to wash the dishes, and you hate washing dishes. You’ve got to decide that washing dishes will be your favorite task and start to love it. You’ve got to lower your standards of happiness.


Don’t Be A “Dancing Monkey”

Now, here’s a word of warning.

Self-amusement is not about getting giggling attraction from girls or acting like a clown to entertain them and get their approval or make the girls like you.

It’s more about pushing the boundaries of pissing them off and breaking rapport. You’re trying to make yourself laugh, not the girls. That’s very important. This is NOT about impressing the girls and making them like you, but about having your own FUN.

So it’s not funny to the girls. It should be funny to YOU.

You’re getting your pleasure and kicks from the girl’s reactions, positive OR negative. And because you draw her into what YOU think is funny, now the GIRL will often think it’s funny.

You Sill Need Sexual Intent

Another thing. You also want to have sexual intent when you do self-amusement. You can have a lot of fun and shenanigans and get tons of interest from women and own the bars and clubs and have girls all over you.

But just having FUN itself is not enough to get you laid. You also need to have sexual intent and physical leading and persisting in the set as well. You still need to man up and push the set. So you’ve got to balance self-amusement with making a connection with a girl and moving it forward.

Make Going Out FUN

Focus less on the goal of “getting a girl to like me” through a trial of sweat and tears, and work, and trial by fire, and needing manly balls of steal, or needing to go through this incredible regimen of constant self-improvement to just make a girl like you.

But transform the process into what it should be. FUN!!

Transform it into a process that actually RECHARGES your batteries, and doesn’t tire you out.

So that you can go out in a single day or single evening and meet a bunch of new girls being very CHILL, very easily, with NO pressure, get a lot of girls instantly-on attracted to you, and having a casual FUN time doing it.

So that you feel better, there’s far less pressure, it feels good, you feel happy, and meeting women becomes like your time off.

It’s chill, it’s all cool, it’s fun, it recharges up your batteries, and as a side effect to just being this glorious aspect of your life, you get laid with cuties! As just part of the process of going out being cool and FUN.

Spending more time of your day happy and smiling and feeling energized and positive.

Itching to go outside, because you KNOW you’ll be meeting beautiful new girls, you know that they’re going to be into you, and you know you’re going to get physical with them.

Where going out is FUN.

Going out is a blast.

Going out is truly awesome.

As a great way to have new adventures.

And to bring happiness and aliveness and vitality BACK into your life!

To develop a full dating life where you can meet a hot girlfriend who’s really into you.


“What To Say” to girls and self-amusement
 Now if you’re having issues with your conversation being boring, or not having something to say, it’s because you’re being too serious in what you want to say and trying to impress the girl.

Instead, you want to move toward being positive, playful, silly, not trying to impress her, and think of how you can make this FUN. How can you self-amuse YOURSELF with this girl?

And if you make the conversation about having some silly fun, and self-amusing, the girl will have fun too.

Force The Fun

Basically, you want to FORCE the fun. Be the party. That no matter what is going on, you’re going to make this fun somehow, you’re going to force it.

That’s what being the guy who is the life of the party is!

You know, the guy where everyone in the room can be tired and beat and slow, and this guy shows up and the whole energy of the room changes. Him being around, you start getting excited, laughing, it’s fun, because the guy is forcing the fun.

So how do you force the fun?

Basically having a really strong frame of positivity and that everything is awesome and any situation can be made fun!

Also, you did it by lowering your threshold to have fun. You see, most people set a very high bar for feeling happy. They think they can only feel fun and happiness if they’re on vacation on a tropical beach, or if they’re getting laid with a hot girl. They need all these conditions checked off before they think they can feel good and positive.

But really, having fun and feeling positive is always a choice.

You can just DECIDE to have fun in any moment.

And if you FORCE it, even if the girls around you are being bitchy or neutral or boring, if you FORCE the fun, they’ll enjoy your state more than they enjoy their own, and they’ll gravitate to your fun, literally getting sucked into your frame of positivity no matter what.

Now this forcing the fun, and self-amusement is really critical in a club environment where it’s essential to suck women into your positivity, and somewhat less so in day game.

But even day game you can still be laughing with the girl, joking around, and she’ll love your for that. The key is not to be canned, but to ride on the edge of chaos and let it free flow.

So just self-amuse yourself, enjoy life, and girls will want to be around you. Don’t look for things in your environment to tell you now is the time to be happy, don’t wait for someone else or something else to pump you up with happiness, being happy is a decision you make in every moment.

Having Fun Takes Energy

And that takes energy. Feeling good and having fun and sucking girls into your reality does take energy. It takes work to force that smile, to force that positive energy, to laugh, and to embrace what the moment is giving you and express that.

It’s really easier to sit down and fuzz out in front of the television, it conserves energy to chill out.

So while intellectually we think, “Yeah, I want the girls, I want the party, I want the fun and happiness,” in reality it’s easier to just sit back and check our email.

So you do need to take action, and massive action at that to start the self-amusement process and start changing your habits and neural circuitry to be conveying fun and positivity – to be fantastically fun throughout your day, in a way that DRAWS people in.

But once you’ve got that, girls are attracted to you because you exude the party, they want to be around you, and they want to be just like you.

5 Ways To Pump Your State And Make Dating and Pickup Fun Again

5 Ways To Pump Your State And Make Dating and Pickup Fun Again



One of the most important principles of feeling good and feeling positive to go out and meet girls, and *maintaining* positivity is all based on this single principle:

Emotion follows Motion.

In other words, your inner emotions, your state, follows from your physical actions and motions.

So the way you move, the way you breathe, the way you exercise your muscles, the way you facially express yourself, the way you work your vocal chords, the way you hold your posture… instantly affects the way we feel, the way we think, and the way we respond.


How Our Physical Motions Affect Our Emotions


And it’s universal. A depressed person has a specific posture. They’re slumped over, their shoulders are down, their eyes are heavy, their breathing is shallow, and their facial expression is slack.

While a happy person stands tall, shoulders up, eyes alight, breathing full, with a particular facial expression.

And you can change your state and emotions instantly in seconds, just by changing the motion of your own body.

So if you force yourself to smile, even if you’re feeling blue, you’ll start to feel happier.

If you get up and start moving, even if you feel depressed and you don’t want to get out of bed, you’ll start to feel better.

If you talk and act as if you have the traits and attitudes of a happy person, quite soon you’ll begin to feel happy.

Think of how you feel right now, from 1 to 10. Maybe you feel like a 6 or a 7… maybe an 8 at most, right?

Well, now do ten jumping jacks. Even if it seems silly and you’re not in the particular mood to do so. Now, do you feel better than before

Even just working out by vocal chords speaking this lesson itself pulls up my state and mood.

Or make funny faces, stick out your tongue… THAT will pull up your mood.

Conversely, the more you limit a person’s physical motion, the more you limit their inner emotions.

Like can you think of an old person, someone who doesn’t “get around much anymore?” Getting old is not a matter of age, it’s really a matter of lack of movement. And the ultimate lack of movement is death.

Little Kids Move To Have Fun

And when you were a little kid, you had all this motion. You spent as much time trying to stand on your head and jumping off the stairs and doing somersaults as you spent on your own two feet. You laughed and cried and jumped around and just fucking MOVED without caring about what others thought, because you were a kid, and that’s what all kids do – they just want to PLAY physically.

But as adults we learn to limit our motion to be “appropriate”. But appropriate means you fit into somebody else’s box, and if you fit into somebody else’s box you’re rarely going to have an extraordinary life.

So moving more and moving better is an important factor in really enjoying your life and feeling good inside and having that positive state for meeting women.

But most people don’t move much anymore. They’re couch potatoes. Or they keep moving in the same, sedentary way, and the just recycling through the same emotions again and again – a little bit of frustration, a little bit of happiness, a little bit or boredom, a little bit of tiredness, but they don’t FEEL anything REAL and INTENSE.

But physical movement is energy. Physical movement is life. Physical movement is what will make you FEEL good.

Like just going to the gym and having a good workout with the blood coursing through your veins will make you feel that starburst state, and make the rest of your day feel great and put a smile on your face.

Or take dancing. Dancing involves laughing, dancing involves smiling faces, friendly voices, meeting new people, and the possibility of sex. Dancing is a physically vigorous activity on two feet. And studies show that dancing is the single greatest source of joy of all activities that a person can do.

Because everything that we feel is the result of how we use our bodies. It’s difficult to hold onto a frown when you’re doing the salsa with a bunch of cute girls.

An Example

Here’s how you can pump up your state so that you feel energetic and eager to go out and meet women.

One evening I helped my buddy move a bunch of furniture. It was real exhausting working. Sweating, muscles burning. Every muscle in your body STRAINS. And it’s a real cardio workout as well, your heart gets pumping.

Well that was a Friday evening, and right after I showered and changed, I went out. And right off the bat I was on fire, talking to and grabbing every set of girls on site with like a dangerous lunatic.

Something about just having that total body pumping workout set me on fire from the first moment – whereas normally it takes me a little while of being social to warm up.

So the key to being in a good, positive, in the moment state is physical movement.

Spiking Your Emotions

You’ve got facial movement – so you always want to smile, even just force it.

You’ve got posture, how you hold yourself – so you want to stand tall like a champ with your chest out and proud.

You’ve got vocal movement – so you want to speak nice and LOUDLY.

And if you’re feeling a little down in the bar or club, you’ve got to get your body MOVING.

This means opening a set of girls, or just physically pumping yourself up.

Like through dancing.

Shout ay-ay-ay-ay-ay.

Or clap and sing with the beat and music.

If you’re with a friend, you can lock arms with your buddy and jump up and down… or high five each other.

You spin in circles.

Do an Indian pow-wow war dance.

Make impressions of animals like elephants and gorillas.

Sure, doing an Indian pow-wow dance in a club *looks* foolish; but it’ll give you an incredible shot of adrenaline and boost like you just chugged a liter of Red Bull. And it will make you fearless for approaching because it will pull you out of your blah-blah emotional state and out into the sky.

So if you’re ever lacking for enthusiasm, remember you need to get physically moving and force yourself to do it.

And if you need to pump yourself up at the club, start dancing, clapping, shouting, spinning, do an Indian pow-wow dance, make funny animal impressions, make funny faces, and get your face moving, your posture in line, your body moving, your vocal chords moving, and that will really make all the difference in the world to your inner game.








Talk To Girls To Pump Your State


One of the best ways to get into state, is to simply walk up to girls, start talking, and start having fun with it, while at the same time physically escalating.

And when the girl tries to mess up your positive vibe by being too serious or by being non-responsive to the frame you’re setting, you just hold your fun, positive frame and eventually she finds it more FUN than hers, and she gets drawn in.

And with every girl you open, as long as you remain unreactive to hold your state, will pump up your state a little more until you reach a feeling of freedom from outcome, where it feels like nothing can hold you back.

And at that point, once you’re “in state” from all the social momentum, you can virtually say ANYTHING and it will work better than any kind of pickup lines or routines.

Work On Your Overall Beliefs


You can also work on your overall belief system. This is just how you perceive who you are, how you look at life, what kind of emotions you spend much of your time in.

For instance, if you perceive that you suck with girls and you go around feeling depressed, that makes it very hard to get into a great state.

But if you spend much your day thinking to yourself that you’re the champ and feeling happy and positive, it makes it very easy to get into a great state.

It’s basically how you’re feeling from day to day.

Warning – Be Careful Of State Dependence !

A word of caution however…

You’ve got state dependence when you have this belief or feeling that you need to be in a good state to do well with girls. You think you’ve got to feel awesome and positive and energetic to get good results.

So when you’re feeling good, you believe you’ll do well.

And conversely, when you feel like you’ve got no state, you’ve pre-determined that you need to get good state first before talking to any girls.

You think that because you’ve got a bad state, you’re game will suck, and no girl can possibly be attracted to you.

The problem with this belief, is that when you’ve got no state, your game will suck or you won’t even try, and then you suck or don’t try because you don’t have any state, and it becomes like a self-fulfilling prophecy or negative cycle that’s difficult sometimes to pull yourself out of.

You’ll either have great nights where you’re “on” or you’ll have nights where you’re “off” and you crash and you crash hard.

And then you won’t feel like going out unless you feel like you’re 100% on. You’ll avoid meeting girls unless you’re state “perfect” which it rarely will be.

The fallacy behind state dependence is that, while feeling energetic and positive will get you better results overall, great state is NOT necessary to creating hard attraction.

Pickup and game is NOT about being “liked” which is a subtle form of supplication, wanting to be liked all the time and always getting positive responses. Even if your state is bad, you can still approach a girl in a low key way, strike up a low key conversation, physically escalate, and still generate hard attraction – no state needed.


Don’t use pickup to lift your spirits

Another problem guys have is trying to use pickup and game to change how they feel.

The guy feels inadequate or kind of shitty, and he wants to use pickup or game to lift his spirits.

So when he gets good reactions, gets eye contact, makes a girl laugh, he feels his state pick up, he feels like he’s a success, he feels like he’s likable.

But when a set doesn’t go as well, when the girl doesn’t react in the way he was looking for, he feels unlikable, he feels like he sucks and he’s unworthy.

And you get this seesaw rollercoaster effect, where one moment you can be high as a kite, and another moment you can be down in the dumps, where you have no control over your internal state. Where you’re using girls validation and the game to try to change how you feel and your state.

This gets especially worse as you get more experienced.

Early on, just going up to a girl AT ALL, doing your first approach, will make you feel an incredible buzz of excitement. It’s easy to use the environment and girls’ validation to pump your state and feelings, because your expectations are so incredibly low. ANYTHING makes you feel good, because you’ve never done it before.

But pretty soon, just approaching a girl won’t give you the same high. Pretty soon, you’ll feel like you need to kiss the girl to succeed, or physically escalate.

And you start entertaining the girl, trying to please her, trying to force good reactions, so that you can get positive responses to get that same high you got from before. But pleasing girls all the time at every moment gets exhaustive and it’s not fun over the long haul.

At that point, you CAN’T rely on the game to determine how you feel, because at that stage of advancement you’ll get incredibly variable results from day to day and from girl to girl.

So you want to stay away from using the game and using girls’ validation to feel good and manipulate your state.

Instead, you want to set your expectations very low.

And when your expectations are low, that’s when you’ll start having fun because you’re not expecting anything really big and you can’t be disappointed. When your expectations are low, you’ll be able to draw state from within, from internally, and gradually build your state up over the night, not being based on positive or negative reactions, but based on being a social guy, talking, and physically putting yourself out there and meeting new people.

So don’t be state dependent, state is not necessary for going out to meet girls, and don’t look to the girls to amp your state.

How to Make a Connection With a Woman

How to Make a Connection With a Woman


Men who are able to read the signals that women send out are less likely to be successful in getting dates than those who continue to misread these flirting signals. Truly, there are signals that spell a win for any guy who can sense it as soon as possible. Some guys, though, fall for the ploys that girls use to get free drinks from the men they reel in with smiles and fake interest.

To avoid falling prey to a woman’s charm and being taken for a ride without getting a single phone number back, you have to have the upper hand in any interaction with a woman. Read on for some more tips on how to do this.

1. Make her believe you understand her better than she thinks.

The effect of a cold reading can be scary and exciting for some women. It’s uncanny when a man can seem to read her after a few minutes of talking. She ends up thinking she might be too transparent, or you’re this superman who has x-ray vision and extra-sensory perception. Or, she could end up thinking you really are meant to be together, and meeting in the club like this is fate.

If you have her dancing to your tune and hanging on to every word you say, you can take it farther and tell her that you may be soul mates. Women are into those kinds of things.

When women are flustered by the ‘truth’ in your words, she either gets defensive or she opens up totally. Either way will work for you. Cold reading is a skill that requires you to think fast on your feet, and change your stories or predictions according to the woman’s reactions.

2. Push her buttons.

Teasing a girl you like should feel familiar; you’ve been doing this since you were in kindergarten. While there are many differences between pulling a girl’s pigtails when you were a lot younger and blatantly teasing a woman you just met, the principles behind these actions are similar.

The goal is to make her react, to challenge her, and to make her look at you in a different way. When you push a woman’s buttons, you get her attention and more importantly, you keep her hooked on you. Most women think of the interaction that ensues after a bout of teasing as ‘making a connection’, which is the most important thing in dating.

You don’t have to believe that skill in dating and picking up women comes only after you’ve dealt with rejection in every shape and form. Even if you’re new to dating, you can make a connection with a woman as long as you handle the interaction smoothly.

How To Turn A Friend Into A Lover

How To Turn A Friend Into A Lover


I'm about to reveal to you some pretty advanced knowledge - turning a woman friend into a lover isn't only rare, it's also extremely difficult. Most "unenlightened" men simply won't be able to do this. If you don't know what you are doing you could easily lose everything - even the friendship.

But, if you can get good at turning friends into lovers you will have an invaluable skill... you'll be able to go in "under the radar" so to speak by befriending a woman before trying to "pick her up." Sure, the process is slower but for men who aren't in a hurry it's great. I will actually do this so that I can get an idea of a woman's true nature while we are "friends" before I begin to date her. I use it as a screening process so that I don't end up with shallow, unscrupulous, or dumb women.

Here's the difficulty ...

The woman considers you a friend so, when you start laying the moves on her, she is going to get freaked out, resist your advances, and probably avoid you for a while. So, the challenge is this... getting her to like you before she knows that you like her. It sounds a little like grade school when you put it in those terms but that is the essence of the solution.

But, the nature of friendships is one where you just "let your hair down" and "be yourself." You are just supposed to relax and have a good time... it's a whole other world compared to dating where you are always supposed to be putting your best foot forward.

And this is precisely where men run into trouble. You cannot act like a friend with a woman and expect her to become attracted to you. Instead, you must begin acting like a lover (whether you are one or not) before she can begin considering you as a lover.

Makes sense, doesn't it ?

Now, allow me to clarify, when I say you are supposed to start acting like a lover I do not mean to make advances on her and, above all, I do not mean that you should start acting really "nice" around her. What I'm saying is that you should start to exude the qualities that women are attracted to. The qualities that women look for in lovers. 
 
Avoid these typical friend behaviors:

1- NEVER allow her to talk to you about other men she is interested in. Change the subject, without being obvious about it, if this ever happens. If she is talking to you about other guys you have become the equivalent of a girl friend - not good.

2- Don't be available to her 24/7. Yes, a friend is always there but, remember, you aren't trying to be a friend, your trying to be a lover. In order to be a lover she needs to like you - but not like you as a friend.

3-Don't "just hang out" and do boring stuff. Women want excitement, they want entertainment, they want to go out and have the time of their lives. This is what women are attracted to. Friends hang around the house and watch movies, lovers go out and spend money (just kidding, you don't have to spend $$ but you do need to put some effort and planning into the activities).

4-Don't spill your guts. Best friends talk about all the embarrassing, idiotic things they have done. Lovers, on the other hand, highlight their positive, admirable qualities and experiences. No matter what she says, she WILL look down on you for telling her about all the CRAP you did in the past.

After a while, she should start to give off some signals. Maybe she will look deep into your eyes for longer than normal, maybe she will make subtle hints (that you probably won't notice unless you are watching for them), or maybe she will just come out and say she is interested in you.

The funny (and magical) part about this process is that, whether she realizes it at first or not, you guys WILL be dating. When her friends and family see you guys going out and having fun together they will say things to her like "Are you guys dating?" and "Are you interested in him?" Regardless of her answer, the probing questions of her friends will get her mind working in that direction. 

The next time you guys go out (and have a blast together) it will be in the back of her mind. While she is having a great time with you she will be thinking "Gee, maybe Jenny is right, maybe I do like him... he sure is fun."

THE ONLINE GAME INTERNET ATTRACTION SYSTEM

THE ONLINE GAME INTERNET ATTRACTION SYSTEM

The newest and hottest way to pickup girls recently has been through the internet. With an insane growth in websites like Facebook and MySpace... and not to mention online dating websites... the internet has officially become the #1 playground where singles meet.

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Derek Lamont has layout out, step-by-step, exactly what you need to do to successfully pickup beautiful girls online. And that's not it... he's completed his package with audio and added a plethora of additional bonuses that will surely help ANY guy. 

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The Online Seduction Formula - The art of approaching women

The Art of Approaching Women

 All men want to be able to talk freely with women.  It’s the first step to winning their hearts, getting them to go on a date with you, or getting them to go home with you.  However, approaching a woman has to be one of the most daunting tasks there is. 

You may second-guess yourself, stutter, say something stupid or inappropriate, and fail to impress her. 

You may be afraid that she’ll laugh at you instead of with you or turn you down before giving you a chance. 

Mastering the art of approaching women is one way to get over all of those insecurities and fears.  Below, find a lot of helpful tips to use when approaching any new woman for the first time.

First impressions are everything, so think carefully about the first words you say to a woman.  The best approach is to always say something genuine.  Don’t spout out clichéd pick-up lines like “what’s your sign?”  These overused lines are the most unoriginal thing out there. 

More often than not, they fail to grab a woman’s attention because they’ve heard them before.  Of course, some men can’t think of anything else to say.  If you have to use a well-known pick-up line, then try to have an original delivery.  Getting a woman to laugh while using an old pick-up line will help you get your foot in the door.

A better approach than pick-up lines is to compliment the girl.  Don’t act sleazy while you do it, though.  If you approach a woman and obviously check her out while telling her she looks hot, she may feel insulted. 

It’s because no woman likes to be looked at as if she’s a piece of meat you want to sink your teeth into.  However, if you approach her and smile and compliment her hair, her eyes, or her outfit, you may really flatter her.  Telling her that you couldn’t resist coming over to talk to her is another good approach. 

If nothing else, it’ll get her talking and give you a chance to learn her name.  She may even lead the conversation from there, which takes away the pressure of finding a topic of conversation.

Doing a little research before you approach a girl is never a bad idea.  If you’re at a store and you see her in line, take the time to examine what she’s buying.  If it’s a movie or CD you know something about, you can approach her and tell her what a good purchase she’s making and then introduce yourself.  

If you spot her at a bar and she’s ordering a certain kind of drink, then pay attention to when she finishes it.  Then you can buy her a second one and use it as an excuse to approach her.  Of course, buying her a drink doesn’t guarantee that she’ll want to talk to you, so don’t expect anything from it. 

However, it’s a good way to get her attention.  If she’s at a sports game and cheering for a certain team, you can either cheer with her or lightly tease her for supporting the wrong team (depending on which side you’re rooting for).

Why does doing a little research first work?  When approaching a woman, starting a conversation is often the hardest thing to do.  Once the two of you start talking, everything is fine.  So, if you approach her and bring up a topic you know she’s interested in, it’s much easier than if you go in blind. 

So, use your powers of observation to figure out something she may like to talk about.  Don’t listen in to her conversations or overtly stare at her all night trying to figure it out, but some subtle “research” can’t hurt you.

Another important tip to remember when approaching women is that confidence is key.  Even if you’re completely nervous, you have to work up the confidence to approach her.  Be brave and you won’t stumble over your words and embarrass yourself.  

A friendly smile can show this confidence, even if you don’t feel it.  And as long as the woman sees that you look confident, she’ll be impressed.

Along with confidence, you need to master some basic rules.  Don’t appear too needy or clingy.  Don’t hang all over her or invade her personal space.  Approaching women is an art form because you have to learn how close is too close and know when to back off. 

A good rule of thumb is to stand a foot or so away from the woman and speak clearly.  However, if you speak a little quietly, she may lean into you to hear you, which means she gets to choose how close you get.  Letting the woman take control is a great approach.

Finally, you have to realize that you won’t always have a successful approach.  Some women won’t be won over by your charms.  There can be many reasons for this – she’s already taken, she’s just out with the girls tonight, she’s just had a bad break up – but it doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you.  

If you have one failed approach, don’t let that stop you.  If at first you don’t succeed, try again with a different woman.

For most men, practice makes perfect.  Not all women will react to your approach in a manner you desire, but that doesn’t mean you should ever quit.  Put yourself out there and use the above tips to conquer your fears.  A lot of women will respond if you are genuine and if you act natural. 

_	The online Seduction Formula  The ultimate guide to the world over no matter which site you use “How Does This Single, Shy, Stammering 'G-G-Geek' Consistently Attract The Hottest Most Beautiful Women?" click here

Flirting Formula - tips and strategies to talk to women

5 Shockingly Easy Methods on How to Flirt With Women

 

Well, for this subject, we’ll need to ask a girl, because girls are the queens of anything and everything flirting. Truth be told, us guys are merely pawns in their wicked, wicked game of sultry seduction.

So I asked my friend “Brenda.” That’s not really her name, and she’ll only contribute to this article based on the condition that I use strict anonymity. To make a long story short, she’s got this Brutus the beefcake boyfriend who’s just a tad bit jealous (translation: he’s a freakin’ psycho idiot with weird ears and a Hulk Hogan tattoo).

Anyways, I asked Brenda to tell me about her flirting techniques and she was more than happy to spill her guts. I personally don’t really remember much from that time, but I damn sure remember the night Brenda walked into the club.

She had long, blonde hair, ocean-blue eyes and legs that go on for miles. Coincidentally, I took her home that night, but I’m not sure if it was my stunning good looks, or my successful flirting technique. She told me it was both. The evening started off much like any other typical club night. Had a drink, talked to some girls, had another drink, talked to some other girls, had another drink…you get the picture.

So Brenda walks in, and I nearly choked on my Jack Daniels and Coke. She came in with a group of girls, but I was immediately drawn to her. I stood in the back of the bar, and watched her work the room like a pro.

She passed me on the way to the bathroom, and I shyly looked up at her and gave her a half-smile. Honestly, I was almost pissing down my leg that she even looked my way. So I contemplated my timing and estimated when she might be walking out.

This was a complicated process. I know from experience bathroom breaks for girls are ridiculously long. It’s not like they whip it out and hit the nearest urinal. I estimated two minutes for the actual peeing process. I estimated 30 seconds to wash her hands (Brenda looked like the kind of girl who washes her hands).

I estimated another 45 seconds for hair touch-ups, another 20 seconds for lip gloss, and 15 seconds to give herself that final once-over in the mirror. So exactly three minutes and fifty seconds after Brenda walked into the bathroom, I made my way to the men’s room.

I turned and looked the other way and wait for it…wait for it…BAM! As Brenda was putting her powder back into her purse, she bumped into me, and I conveniently spilled my drink all over myself (it’s a small sacrifice).

“Oh my gosh…I am so sorry! Here, let me help you,” Brenda said to me as I muttered something about how clumsy I was and it was me who should be sorry. “You poor thing. You’re soaked. I feel awful. Well, the least I can do is buy you a drink since I just wasted yours.”

Hook…line…sinker!

I have never told Brenda what actually happened that night, mainly because she’s still a regular 3 a.m. booty call, and I intend to keep it that way. So I asked Brenda for her top five favorite ways men flirt with her. I was a little shocked, to say the least, at some of her answers, but if we imbecile men want to know how to flirt with women, then we have to ask a woman.

I also asked Brenda if I could practice these techniques on her, and she was more than happy to oblige. Coincidentally, we didn’t make it past number three before we were in her bedroom, so trust me when I say these techniques are a sure-fire way to a woman’s….ummmm….heart. To flirt with a woman, you need to be the guy she wants you to be.

Re-invent yourself

• Shy guy– Dummy me thought women liked a “take charge” kind of guy. A man’s man. A guy who’s going to show her what’s up. Well, that’s relatively true. But what they really want, at first anyways, is a cute, quiet, shy guy whom they can wrap their arms around and protect from all the stinky skanky sluts of the world.In other words, don’t throw yourself over the first available relatively attractive female. Women apparently like a little mystery, so give it to them. Sure, flash them your pearly whites (hope you used your Crest white strips) and leave the rest to them. You just have to pull them in with your “Mr. Bashful” routine. For God’s sakes, don’t let them know you were voted “biggest flirt” in high school. 

• Mr. My Girlfriend Just Dumped Me– This is too easy. Girls fall for a guy whose heart is hurting. They want to comfort them and protect them that mean ol’ nasty ex-girlfriend who broke your heart. Lay on the tears if you have to. Girls love vulnerable men. Soon, she’ll be telling you why your ex is frickin’ crazy for letting go of a guy like you. Once she’s well into her pity party, slowly look into her eyes and tell her how pretty she is. Sure, it’s all based on a big fat lie, but love is a battlefield, so go into it heavily armed.

• Squeeze her, tease her, please her– this is undoubtedly my favorite method of flirting, and girls go absolutely nuts for it. They love being poked (gently), prodded, and teased. Tell her she’s getting “bossy.”  Tease her about the wild side she keeps hidden from her friends. If she’s a blonde, tell her a blonde joke, but don’t make it too crude. Girls love a guy who can make her laugh. When she gets up to go to the bathroom, block her way. Trust me, she’ll love it.

•  Competitive flirting– there’s nothing better than a little friendly competition. If she’s athletic, you can challenge her to a game of one-on-one hoops. Gorgeous girl, basketball, two bodies crashing against each other in a sweaty contest…what’s better? If she’s not athletic, challenge her to a game of scrabble or monopoly, or Jeopardy. On second thought, leave Jeopardy out, you really don’t want her to know you can be completely ignorant at times.

• Tickle her – There’s nothing girls like more. But know the definition of tickling before you try it. Do not jump on top of her, hold her down, and freakin’ violate her. She’s not going to like it and your parents will see your mug shot on the front page of tomorrow’s edition. Tickling can be subtle, and doesn’t have to make her piss her pants. Try a feather and slowly move it up and arm. It’s guaranteed goosebumps.

Any of these methods are good things to try, but it’s not the be-all, end-all manual to flirting. That actually depends on the girl you’re trying to flirt with. Some girls are more playful, and some are as serious as a nuclear attack. Get to know the girl first (this is a good time for some serious Facebook stalking), and find out her likes and interests.

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