Saturday, June 30, 2012

THE ONLINE GAME INTERNET ATTRACTION SYSTEM



THE ONLINE GAME INTERNET ATTRACTION SYSTEM



THE ONLINE GAME INTERNET ATTRACTION SYSTEM

The newest and hottest way to pickup girls recently has been through the internet. With an insane growth in websites like Facebook and MySpace... and not to mention online dating websites... the internet has officially become the #1 playground where singles meet.
But let's face it... for guys... it's definitely NOT easy.

Women have all the power when it comes to online pickup. Luckily for you, we've recently reviewed some of the top online attraction program available on the internet... and luckily for you, we've found the best one.

Derek Lamont and his team of elite online attraction pickup artists have recently developed a fool-proof system for picking up those hot girls on Facebook, MySpace and other online venues.

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Derek Lamont has layout out, step-by-step, exactly what you need to do to successfully pickup beautiful girls online. And that's not it... he's completed his package with audio and added a plethora of additional bonuses that will surely help ANY guy. 


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Other programs were simply not as effective - and we've thoroughly tested ALL of them. After just messaging three girls using Derek Lamont's techniques, we had successfully setup a date with a gorgeous blonde... and within minutes!



His stuff truly works the best.
So if you want to turn your computer into a seduction machine and seriously make that Facebook account useful, then seriously look into his program.
You'll find everything you need to know on his website... www.OnlinePickupSecrets.com - go check it out right now! He's got a few tidbits on how to get started quickly and easily!
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Attract And Sleep With TWO Women By The End Of The Week! -How to Tell if She Likes You

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How to Tell if She Likes You

 

Everyone knows that women can be confusing.  Sometimes they flirt just to be friendly, even if they don’t want to make an advance on you.  Sometimes they like you but won’t tell you.  These behaviors can be extremely frustrating, but there are ways to figure out women.  If you want to be able to tell if she likes you, look for the following hints and signals.  They may be subtle, but women only act in this manner if they really like a guy.

Signs of Physical Attraction

The first thing to look for is signs of physical attraction.  When a woman likes a man, they usually play with their hair or smile a lot.  They’ll also lean in close to him while talking.  If they really like the guy, some girls will even pat him on the shoulder or arm.  Physical contact from a girl you just met is usually a sign that she’s into you.
There are other subtle hints a girl will drop.  These all have to deal with their body language and actions.  If a girl really likes you, she’ll be turned towards you while talking.  Her upper body will be angled your way and she’ll be making eye contact.
One sure fire way to tell if a girl likes you is to pay attention to their laughter.  A girl naturally laughs a lot when she’s with a guy she likes.  This happens because the girl will most likely be having fun and enjoying herself since she’s spending time with a man she’s attracted to.  So, if a girl is laughing at all of your jokes and genuinely enjoying herself with you around, it’s a good sign that she likes you.

Regular Contact

While some women won’t blatantly tell you they are into you, they will make the effort to spend time with you.  If a girl is calling you a few times a week to hang out or go on dates, then they are most likely interested.  The same thing applies if you call them and they agree to go out to dinner.  

Of course, when a girl likes a guy, she doesn’t want to seem desperate.  If you call her and ask her out and she says she already has plans, don’t worry.  This just means she has a life of her own, too.  As long as she reschedules with you and goes on the date on another day, you can bet she wants to be with you.

The final sign that a girl likes you is this: she pays a lot of attention to you.  If she’s always listening while you’re talking about your interests, she’s into you.  She’ll show this by asking questions based on what you’re talking about.  

For instance, if you’re talking about your favorite hobby and she asks for little details about it, then she’s listening.  Also, she’ll probably smile a lot and maintain eye contact.  This kind of attention should show you she’s interested.

You can tell that she likes you if she exhibits a few of the above behaviors.  Sure, a girl can call you to hang out and just want to be your friend, but if she does that and shows signs of physical attraction, odds are she wants something more than just to be your buddy.  Pay attention to the little things she does and you’ll know for sure if she’s into you.

How to tell if she likes you as said above can be and definitely are challenging you sometimes have to be patient. I actually got a call from a girl I met 3 weeks after we changed numbers, like they say “patients are a virtue”.  I recommend that you don’t get all hasty if you got here number, at least wait half a week. I recommend calling or texting here mid week, don’t send here a message Friday or Saturday night, in most cases she probably won’t answer a desperate late night call. Chances are you blew it right there.

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How To Turn Your Partner Into A Swinger

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Tips to Getting Partner Interested in Swinging

Swinging could be an awesome activity a couple of to obtain familiar with. Performed the best way, it don't have to be damaging for the relationship whatsoever. Actually, the consensus amongst most 'successful' swingers is it actually enhances their relationship and brings them closer with each other.

Nonetheless, though you will discover millions of satisfied swinging couples throughout the world, there's also lots of people today within a relationship who wish to try swinging but who've somebody who's not keen. Their attitude may possibly be from not interested to becoming entirely damaging regarding the notion. For all those that have a husband or wife inside of this category, don't despair. The ideal to become swingers don't require to die.

The extremely initial factor you have to do is not get angry or upset with each other along with your wife or husband's reaction need to you mention the thought of becoming swingers. Attempting to plead with each other or probably in any way coerce them into giving it a go will not get no positive result, it may possibly even harm your relationship. Though you get these phones accept check it out this way, it'll most likely not be deemed a pleasant practical experience for you personally both; you cannot take it easy and revel in it.

Anytime you introduce the thought of swinging, keep in thoughts that your spouse or husband may perhaps have beliefs by what swinging signifies and also the purpose why you might wish to check it out. Will it imply you do not find them beautiful enough? Have you been tired of the appreciate life? These thoughts may possibly be coping with their scalp. Actually, they may possibly even concern that by becoming swingers you may discover an additional person much more attractive than them and after that leave them!

So that your whole concentrate introducing swinging for the husband or wife would be to remove their fears. You'll need to try and do this allowing them understand that you just appreciate and adore them more than other people today, which your purpose in attempting to try swinging would be to increase the appreciate life you've got with each other.

You must inform them that swinging is not about replacing any gaps within your relationship. It really is all about adding some spice and sharing the understanding with each other. You are able to even inform them that due to the fact you find them so beautiful and attractive, seeing them turning an additional person on could be highly arousing on their behalf.

Also assure that you just develop your husband or wife feel protected within your sexual relationship. Develop their trust in your soul. Permit them to now you'll not hurt them or permit them to become hurt within a swinging predicament.
Really should you approach the thought of swinging with each other along with your partner inside of this way check out have only a drastically better possibility of participating in the swinger life-style, but men and women both enjoying it also.


How To Turn Your Partner Into A Swinger

You dream of having threesomes, trying group sex, visiting a swingers club, watching your wife being pleasured by another man (or men), multiple men pleasuring you at the same time, attending free-for-all swingers orgies….. You’d like to be part of the swing lifestyle…


Friday, June 29, 2012

Discover How To Make Your Woman Do Absolutely Anything You Want In Bed- How to Turn a Girl On

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How to Turn a Girl On

 

If you're reading this, you've probably encountered the fact that it's much easier to turn a girl off than it is to turn a girl on. While every girl is different, if you focus on making her feel comfortable, appreciated, and challenged, there's a better chance of physical attraction and intimacy. Have Patience!!!


Make a lasting impression. Be careful not to appear over-confident, though. It is always better to use your skills and qualities in a subtle way, as girls usually are put off by people who show off or display arrogance. Relax and focus your attention on her instead of yourself. Don't spend too much time around her trying to make an impression. Instead, spend lots of time, and then none for a while, then more again, and flirt while you are there. While you are gone, she is given a chance to think about you, which hopefully she will.

Have a great conversation. This is a good way to make her feel comfortable. Many girls need to be turned on emotionally before they can be turned on physically. Let her know that you're interested in her mind as well as her body
.
Do not play hard to get. Girls will take it the wrong way. Show her that you are interested, if you play hard to get she may stop trying to get with you. She will respect you if you are nice to her and not eyeballing other girls.

Make sure to listen when she's talking. Be interested in what she's saying.

Make her feel beautiful and wanted, especially when she reciprocates. If you just met her, then just be enthusiastic and just show by your tone of voice that you're glad she called. Later progress to "hey babe", or preferably "hey, gorgeous." Let her know that when she reaches out to you, she'll feel appreciated. Don't get carried away, though, and go on and on for hours about how happy you are that she called. A little goes a long way.

  • Compliment something that she's wearing (clothes, jewelry, shoes) or the way she has her hair. Say something like "you look good in this shirt", or "I like these jeans on you". But don't say it if you don't mean it.
  • Be affectionate by caressing her hair, kissing her cheek, or holding her hand.

Always take note of her body language and how she responds to the little things you do. find out what she likes, without asking!

Take it slow. As you get closer, it can be tempting to try and rush things, but the slower you take it, the more time she has to realize how much she's into you. Be patient. Your self-control also indicates how much you really value her. Don't be easy, pushy, or needy. For goodness sake, tease her. ( i.e. run a hand along her back (softly) or pull her hair lightly)

Kiss her. Kisses are affectionate, intimate, and powerful. Kiss her well, and kiss her often. Start off with gentle closed-mouth kisses, and wait as long as you can before moving onto French kissing. Even when you do, however, don't let up on the closed-mouth kisses. Plant them behind her ear, on her forehead, on her neck, on her shoulder, wherever you please.

 


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How To Be Super Successful with Women

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Be Successful With Women Using These Super Clever Tips




I've studied how to be successful with women and now have great results at getting women. Here's some pretty smart tips to being super-successful with women that I want to share.

1. Learn the principles of attraction.
If you can't attract a woman, you can forget having any kind of success with them. Most attempts to seduce a woman without first attracting her will FAIL.

If you're not attracted to a woman, would you let her seduce you? Probably not. The same goes for women.
2. Women are attracted to character rather than physical looks.
If you want to be successful, you have to develop some attractive character traits, such as strength (not physical strength but mental strength).





3. Character is conveyed by communication.
How you communicate to women and the environment around you lets women know your character. Communicate in ways that convey attractive character traits and women will be madly attracted to you.

4. Having fun with women is very attractive.
Women love to have fun and find men who have fun very attractive. Develop your natural ability to have with women rather than being all weird, boring or serious around them, which is how most guys behave with women. And which women don't find at all attractive.

5. Being outgoing.
It really helps to be talkative and extroverted as a person. This conveys confidence and mental strength. Again, this is attractive to women.

6. Once a woman is attracted to you, she'll start to want to get to know you.
You will know that a woman is attracted to you when she starts asking you personal questions, such as your name and what you do for a living. At this point, you can get to really know her. And from there you can start to seduce her successfully.



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How To Be Super Successful with Women

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Do You Really Need a Girlfriend to Feel Better About Yourself?






"I want a girlfriend" is a phrase I read and hear a lot. I also hear some men say "I need a girlfriend." I also have had men ask me "how do I get a girlfriend?". My usual response is "why do you want (or need) one so badly?"

Somehow, somewhere, some men have been conditioned to think that their lives would be more meaningful if they had a girlfriend. "But I feel like such a freak if I don't have one," says Jeremy, a 22 year old college Senior. "Most of my friends have one. I feel like a loser."
I hear this from men of all ages and backgrounds. The problem here I see is two-fold: first, that men who say these kinds of things do not have the different skill sets they need in order to secure a date virtually anytime they want. Secondly, there is an inherent problem in thinking that one needs to have a girlfriend in order to feel more complete, popular, or whatever other reason you can think of. Happiness and fulfillment should come from inside first and then having a partner, a girlfriend, or a romantic interest should be the icing on the cake. So if you are one of these men that feels and believes he has to have a girlfriend, that's a big red flag that you are using that as a crutch. A crutch for what, you might ask. It's a crutch for not facing the real, deeper issue(s) that drive that false belief that you have to have a girlfriend.

Men who want a girlfriend are coming from a place of weakness, not power. For the sake of this article, power is defined as the ability to take consistent action toward a very specific purpose. For example, my friend David constantly tells me he wishes he had a girlfriend, but he plays 30 to 40 hours of World of Warcraft each weak instead of learning how to improve his social skills. That is not coming from a place of power. When a man desperately wants a partner it makes him act and behave in a needy and desperate ways. Women pick up on this even before you approach them. They can see it in your posture, your eyes, the way you move your arms, and other aspects of your body language. Then when you talk they can hear it in your voice as well as where you place your hands. You shouldn't "want" a girlfriend or "need" a girlfriend. You should choose to have one when you meet a woman that fits your criteria, won't play silly games with you, and compliments your life, not impedes it.

Men sometimes want a girlfriend for the wrong reasons. Men should "choose" to have a girlfriend, not "need" one because they are succumbing to social pressure or a feeling of insecurity or loneliness. There are times in my life where I did not have a girlfriend for several months or even longer than a year. That did not mean that I did not date. I went out on plenty of dates, but I never called any of them my girlfriend because I was at a place in my life at the time where I did not want anything serious. I've had women tell me after a few months that they wanted to move in with me and when I told them "no", they gave me an ultimatum.

Either take the relationship to the next level or she would end it, she would say (after a few months? Come on!). I would always end it right there on the spot because I never give into selfish ultimatums. The fact is that my self-esteem and confidence are so high that I don't "need" a woman to originate my happiness. I think of my life as dessert and that any woman who wants to join me is simply the whip cream and strawberry on top of it. I realize that sounds a bit corny, but it's a very accurate metaphor. I'm not saying that having a girlfriend is a bad thing. In fact, it's a good thing when it is done for the right reasons.

So how does a man make himself more attractive? The list is nearly endless, but here are a few pointers that men need to seriously think about:

1. Physical Appearance And Hygiene - I used to worry about my height because I didn't think I was tall enough to date tall, attractive women. That was a huge waste of time and energy. I finally realized that I needed to focus on what I could control, such as my weight, my muscle tone, the way I ate, using only one spray of cologne (instead of half the bottle), the whiteness of my teeth, my hairstyle, etc.

2. Confidence - I'm talking about natural confidence that oozes from within, not the phony "I'm-such-a-bad-boy" confidence that immature men think is "cool". If you don't have it now there's only one way to get it: taking action; not just any action, but action that forces you outside of your comfort zone so that you actually grow. Think about it, if you have approach anxiety, you'll never overcome it if you don't approach. Remember the Rule of 25, which states you should eventually approach no less than 25 women per week until you can talk to any woman, any time, and any where. Some men achieve this in one week, others in 3 months because we are all different, have different shyness levels, and might have a bunch of other things going on in our lives.

3. Have A Life - Studies have shown that desirable men have active, social lives. Let's face it, when a woman knows that other women desire you, your social value skyrockets. One way to increase your own social value is to have hobbies and interests that help improve who you are. Playing video games versus going out an learning how to dance salsa, swing, or hip-hop might both be fun for you, but take a wild guess which one gives you more opportunities to meet women? If you couple this with a growing social network, you will naturally find yourself a very busy person with plenty of social events and opportunities to meet new faces. I can go to any major city in the world and within 90 days I can build a social network of new faces and friends that would take an average man a lifetime to build. That's only because I've done it time and time again. If you remained focused there's very little you can accomplish.

4. Having A Plan For Your Life - Are you starting to see a trend here? Have you noticed that the focal point has been to focus on yourself first? Most people go throughout life reacting to it instead of sitting down and writing some rough outline of what they really want out of life. Let's take Samuel, a 33 year old recently divorced accountant, as an example. For many years Samuel thought that having a girlfriend and eventually getting married was the true road to happiness, but he didn't have the social and relationship skills to find the right mate and ended up marrying the wrong woman. He began wondering if this was as good as it gets (sounds like the movie right?).

One day Samuel called me with his dilemma and I advised that he get away for a weekend and to take a notebook and pen with him. I wanted him to spend the entire weekend writing down what he really wanted out of life and the reasons behind them. When he called me a week later, he was a changed man. He started, "I thought that I always needed a girlfriend to feel good about myself. Now I realized that is just one facet to living. Real fulfillment comes from within, from a sense of contributing, and a sense of moving forward."
Samuel was starting to get it. And he eventually met a woman that complimented his own life and he's never been happier.


Do you still want a girlfriend? Or do you feel like you still need one? It's very important that you take a look inside yourself to find the answer. Remember, you should never "need" a girlfriend. You should reach a point in your life where you "choose" to have a girlfriend on your terms. And that makes all the difference in the world. Just ask Samuel.



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Getting your wife o girlfriend to become a Swinger

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Getting your wife o girlfriend to become a Swinger

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How to Get a Girlfriend

How to Seduce a Woman

How to Get a Girlfriend


 

Manage your image. Before you can seduce a girl, you must have a good, positive image. Make friends and be charming with every one you come in contact with. Never hesitate to tell one person what you admire about another, as it will eventually reach that person and appear undoubtedly genuine. Never argue (arguing is anti-seduction). No girl can resist a guy whom everyone likes, unless she's the type to rebel against popular opinion just because it's popular opinion (in which case the remainder of the steps will probably wear her down).

Subtly reveal your human side with talk of taboo and sexuality. If you cannot insinuate, skip this step. When you talk about sex, say it in a way that Shakespeare would approve of. For example, "Sleep is my second favorite thing to do in bed" or "my neighbors are noisy during the day, but that's okay because they put up with me at night."

Do the opposite of what other guys do. If the girl is drop-dead gorgeous, ignore her. After hearing about your rakish reputation, she will wonder why you are not attracted to her. If other guys ignore her, shower her with the attention she has been craving. 

Do not hint that other girls like you. Women hold each other's opinions very highly and they get jealous easily. Yes women get jealous easily but their jealousy will cause them to become moody , non-tolerant and distant when around you. If you hint that plenty of women like you, you will be seen as a Playboy and not taken seriously. Women like to feel like they are the only ones in the world and many desired. They prefer to be chased not the chaser. Hinting that other women like you in a major turn-off.

 Speak seductively. Never start a conversation focused on work, school, MySpace, family, TV shows, or other everyday things. Never talk about yourself. Talk about exotic vacation spots, mythology, sex (sometimes), history, astrology, dreams, fate, and anything else pleasurable and intangible. Don't express any opinions except for your preference for pleasurable things and for things that she likes. Keep a powerful gaze while talking about these things. The eyes are very important.

Never apologize. Never worry when you are talking with a girl, because it will be written all over your face and interpreted as a sign of timidness, which, for many girls, is a turn-off.

Show strategic weakness (optional). This step is optional, but it will speed up the seduction. If you naturally come off as weak, skip this step. For more masculine guys, a flash of weakness and sensitivity will make you seem honest, romantic, harmless, and more akin to a girl's idea of "the one." All girls are frightened of guys on some level. The more feminine and skittish the girl is, the more necessary this step is. The key to performing this step correctly is to bend the truth. Don't talk about breakups or events that you really are sensitive about. As with dancing, it is your job to lead. Don't lead her into a depressing discussion topic. Add a masculine angle to feminine subjects. A good idea would be to say, "yeah, I watched The Notebook. I liked how he didn't give up hope after he saw her with the other guy."

Give her plenty of space. There are bound to be things about you that she doesn't like. Give her time to forget about those things and fantasize about the good things you have to offer.
Make her laugh. When a woman laughs, she feels more relaxed and lowers her defenses (and inhibitions).
Touch her. Reach for her hands, hair, shoulders, ankles, and back. Don't just always wait for her to do it first. If she doesn't like it, she'll definitely let you know. But touching someone communicates to them that you find them attractive, and also that you're reasonably confident. Both of these things can make someone feel more attracted to you.

Make her feel irresistible, like you have to restrain yourself around her. Try it by telling her something seductive, starting with rejection of this desirable thing - ex. "Please don't wear short skirt tonight, as I will not resist the temptation!" or something like that "Please don't touch me like that, cause I like it more than I should!" She'll probably keep doing it (consider it a form of reverse psychology).


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The Online Seduction Formula - The art of approaching women

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The Art of Approaching Women

 All men want to be able to talk freely with women.  It’s the first step to winning their hearts, getting them to go on a date with you, or getting them to go home with you.  However, approaching a woman has to be one of the most daunting tasks there is. 

You may second-guess yourself, stutter, say something stupid or inappropriate, and fail to impress her. 
You may be afraid that she’ll laugh at you instead of with you or turn you down before giving you a chance. 
Mastering the art of approaching women is one way to get over all of those insecurities and fears.  Below, find a lot of helpful tips to use when approaching any new woman for the first time.

First impressions are everything, so think carefully about the first words you say to a woman.  The best approach is to always say something genuine.  Don’t spout out clichéd pick-up lines like “what’s your sign?”  These overused lines are the most unoriginal thing out there. 
More often than not, they fail to grab a woman’s attention because they’ve heard them before.  Of course, some men can’t think of anything else to say.  If you have to use a well-known pick-up line, then try to have an original delivery.  Getting a woman to laugh while using an old pick-up line will help you get your foot in the door.

A better approach than pick-up lines is to compliment the girl.  Don’t act sleazy while you do it, though.  If you approach a woman and obviously check her out while telling her she looks hot, she may feel insulted. 
It’s because no woman likes to be looked at as if she’s a piece of meat you want to sink your teeth into.  However, if you approach her and smile and compliment her hair, her eyes, or her outfit, you may really flatter her.  Telling her that you couldn’t resist coming over to talk to her is another good approach. 

If nothing else, it’ll get her talking and give you a chance to learn her name.  She may even lead the conversation from there, which takes away the pressure of finding a topic of conversation.
Doing a little research before you approach a girl is never a bad idea.  If you’re at a store and you see her in line, take the time to examine what she’s buying.  If it’s a movie or CD you know something about, you can approach her and tell her what a good purchase she’s making and then introduce yourself.  

If you spot her at a bar and she’s ordering a certain kind of drink, then pay attention to when she finishes it.  Then you can buy her a second one and use it as an excuse to approach her.  Of course, buying her a drink doesn’t guarantee that she’ll want to talk to you, so don’t expect anything from it. 

However, it’s a good way to get her attention.  If she’s at a sports game and cheering for a certain team, you can either cheer with her or lightly tease her for supporting the wrong team (depending on which side you’re rooting for).
Why does doing a little research first work?  When approaching a woman, starting a conversation is often the hardest thing to do.  Once the two of you start talking, everything is fine.  So, if you approach her and bring up a topic you know she’s interested in, it’s much easier than if you go in blind. 

So, use your powers of observation to figure out something she may like to talk about.  Don’t listen in to her conversations or overtly stare at her all night trying to figure it out, but some subtle “research” can’t hurt you.
Another important tip to remember when approaching women is that confidence is key.  Even if you’re completely nervous, you have to work up the confidence to approach her.  Be brave and you won’t stumble over your words and embarrass yourself.  

A friendly smile can show this confidence, even if you don’t feel it.  And as long as the woman sees that you look confident, she’ll be impressed.
Along with confidence, you need to master some basic rules.  Don’t appear too needy or clingy.  Don’t hang all over her or invade her personal space.  Approaching women is an art form because you have to learn how close is too close and know when to back off. 

A good rule of thumb is to stand a foot or so away from the woman and speak clearly.  However, if you speak a little quietly, she may lean into you to hear you, which means she gets to choose how close you get.  Letting the woman take control is a great approach.

Finally, you have to realize that you won’t always have a successful approach.  Some women won’t be won over by your charms.  There can be many reasons for this – she’s already taken, she’s just out with the girls tonight, she’s just had a bad break up – but it doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you.  

If you have one failed approach, don’t let that stop you.  If at first you don’t succeed, try again with a different woman.
For most men, practice makes perfect.  Not all women will react to your approach in a manner you desire, but that doesn’t mean you should ever quit.  Put yourself out there and use the above tips to conquer your fears.  A lot of women will respond if you are genuine and if you act natural. 


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Flirting Formula - tips and strategies to talk to women

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5 Shockingly Easy Methods on How to Flirt With Women

 

Well, for this subject, we’ll need to ask a girl, because girls are the queens of anything and everything flirting. Truth be told, us guys are merely pawns in their wicked, wicked game of sultry seduction.

So I asked my friend “Brenda.” That’s not really her name, and she’ll only contribute to this article based on the condition that I use strict anonymity. To make a long story short, she’s got this Brutus the beefcake boyfriend who’s just a tad bit jealous (translation: he’s a freakin’ psycho idiot with weird ears and a Hulk Hogan tattoo).
Anyways, I asked Brenda to tell me about her flirting techniques and she was more than happy to spill her guts. I personally don’t really remember much from that time, but I damn sure remember the night Brenda walked into the club.

She had long, blonde hair, ocean-blue eyes and legs that go on for miles. Coincidentally, I took her home that night, but I’m not sure if it was my stunning good looks, or my successful flirting technique. She told me it was both. The evening started off much like any other typical club night. Had a drink, talked to some girls, had another drink, talked to some other girls, had another drink…you get the picture.
So Brenda walks in, and I nearly choked on my Jack Daniels and Coke. She came in with a group of girls, but I was immediately drawn to her. I stood in the back of the bar, and watched her work the room like a pro.

She passed me on the way to the bathroom, and I shyly looked up at her and gave her a half-smile. Honestly, I was almost pissing down my leg that she even looked my way. So I contemplated my timing and estimated when she might be walking out.
This was a complicated process. I know from experience bathroom breaks for girls are ridiculously long. It’s not like they whip it out and hit the nearest urinal. I estimated two minutes for the actual peeing process. I estimated 30 seconds to wash her hands (Brenda looked like the kind of girl who washes her hands).

I estimated another 45 seconds for hair touch-ups, another 20 seconds for lip gloss, and 15 seconds to give herself that final once-over in the mirror. So exactly three minutes and fifty seconds after Brenda walked into the bathroom, I made my way to the men’s room.
I turned and looked the other way and wait for it…wait for it…BAM! As Brenda was putting her powder back into her purse, she bumped into me, and I conveniently spilled my drink all over myself (it’s a small sacrifice).
“Oh my gosh…I am so sorry! Here, let me help you,” Brenda said to me as I muttered something about how clumsy I was and it was me who should be sorry. “You poor thing. You’re soaked. I feel awful. Well, the least I can do is buy you a drink since I just wasted yours.”

Hook…line…sinker!

I have never told Brenda what actually happened that night, mainly because she’s still a regular 3 a.m. booty call, and I intend to keep it that way. So I asked Brenda for her top five favorite ways men flirt with her. I was a little shocked, to say the least, at some of her answers, but if we imbecile men want to know how to flirt with women, then we have to ask a woman.
I also asked Brenda if I could practice these techniques on her, and she was more than happy to oblige. Coincidentally, we didn’t make it past number three before we were in her bedroom, so trust me when I say these techniques are a sure-fire way to a woman’s….ummmm….heart. To flirt with a woman, you need to be the guy she wants you to be.

Re-invent yourself
  • Shy guy– Dummy me thought women liked a “take charge” kind of guy. A man’s man. A guy who’s going to show her what’s up. Well, that’s relatively true. But what they really want, at first anyways, is a cute, quiet, shy guy whom they can wrap their arms around and protect from all the stinky skanky sluts of the world.In other words, don’t throw yourself over the first available relatively attractive female. Women apparently like a little mystery, so give it to them. Sure, flash them your pearly whites (hope you used your Crest white strips) and leave the rest to them. You just have to pull them in with your “Mr. Bashful” routine. For God’s sakes, don’t let them know you were voted “biggest flirt” in high school. 

  • Mr. My Girlfriend Just Dumped Me– This is too easy. Girls fall for a guy whose heart is hurting. They want to comfort them and protect them that mean ol’ nasty ex-girlfriend who broke your heart. Lay on the tears if you have to. Girls love vulnerable men. Soon, she’ll be telling you why your ex is frickin’ crazy for letting go of a guy like you. Once she’s well into her pity party, slowly look into her eyes and tell her how pretty she is. Sure, it’s all based on a big fat lie, but love is a battlefield, so go into it heavily armed.

  • Squeeze her, tease her, please her– this is undoubtedly my favorite method of flirting, and girls go absolutely nuts for it. They love being poked (gently), prodded, and teased. Tell her she’s getting “bossy.”  Tease her about the wild side she keeps hidden from her friends. If she’s a blonde, tell her a blonde joke, but don’t make it too crude. Girls love a guy who can make her laugh. When she gets up to go to the bathroom, block her way. Trust me, she’ll love it.

  •  Competitive flirting– there’s nothing better than a little friendly competition. If she’s athletic, you can challenge her to a game of one-on-one hoops. Gorgeous girl, basketball, two bodies crashing against each other in a sweaty contest…what’s better? If she’s not athletic, challenge her to a game of scrabble or monopoly, or Jeopardy. On second thought, leave Jeopardy out, you really don’t want her to know you can be completely ignorant at times.

  • Tickle her – There’s nothing girls like more. But know the definition of tickling before you try it. Do not jump on top of her, hold her down, and freakin’ violate her. She’s not going to like it and your parents will see your mug shot on the front page of tomorrow’s edition. Tickling can be subtle, and doesn’t have to make her piss her pants. Try a feather and slowly move it up and arm. It’s guaranteed goosebumps.
Any of these methods are good things to try, but it’s not the be-all, end-all manual to flirting. That actually depends on the girl you’re trying to flirt with. Some girls are more playful, and some are as serious as a nuclear attack. Get to know the girl first (this is a good time for some serious Facebook stalking), and find out her likes and interests.



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